Imagine being so obsessed with someone, that you park outside of their house late at night to take a picture of the front of their house from your car with flowers on your dashboard. Sounds like complete creepy stalker-like stuff, doesn’t it? Now imagine that person you have become so obsessed with is actually an entire football program and that house is Ohio Stadium, home of the Ohio State football program. Such is the case for one Connor Stalions, the low-level staffer who became the fall guy for Michigan during their 2023 cheating scandal.
Stalions posted a picture of himself apparently parked outside of Ohio Stadium late at night with roses and a Michigan 2023 National Championship hat on his dash the other night. His attempt to troll Ohio State looks more like a creepy stalker advertisement than it does a flex.
While most Michigan fans celebrate their National Championship the traditional way, it appears Stalions has taken his celebratory displays on the road; even to the home of the place where he dedicated his unique set of skills in illegally acquiring signals. One has to wonder how many other stadiums Stalions will roll up to by himself, place his championship trinkets on his car dash, and snap a photo for all the world to see his obvious display of idolatry.
Could you imagine walking up to a lone car sitting quietly in an empty parking lot and seeing this international man of mystery staging his Maize and Blue alter on his dash?
I wonder how many hats he has thrown into his back seat just waiting for him to plop on that sorry melon of his so that he can slip onto a campus he has no association with, and slip right back out without getting caught? Oops, sorry about that Central Michigan.
What’s even crazier is how this self-proclaimed used vacuum salesman with one-and-a-half star reviews on Amazon has somehow become a folk hero for Wolverine fans. You would think that with what this man has done, possibly being the reason why their beloved program may find itself in hot water with the NCAA, that he would be the Steve Bartman of Michigan football. Instead, he is having heaps of praise reign down on him from the fanbase that was so starved for a title, that apparently, they were willing to sell their souls to acquire it.
I jokingly call us Ohio State football fans a cult. But given the behavior I have seen surrounding Stalions this season, it is obvious that the real cult resides north of Toledo, Ohio.
So, the next time you are driving and you see someone pass you on the road and you see that ugly “Pure Michigan” license plate, be careful. That person might be crazy. It might even be Stalions on his way to another photo shoot.